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So, here's the deal:
Yesterday I had a long, sometimes arduous conversation with a great friend that quickly dived into the race pool. We've all been there. It is a place that is uncomfortable. It is a place that is wild. It is a place we'd really wish didn't exist. But it does.
For the most part we are an advanced people, capable of dealing with issues like race with relative care and, dare I say, a deft touch. Like it or not, we all walk a fine line of right and wrong. And there is nothing wrong with that --- it is just a fact of life. We'd all like to live in a perfect world where race isn't an issue. But that is not the case. And, sadly, it will never be the case. There are just far too many prejudices that are built in to us. Not, mind you, just by individual upbringing, but some of it is by nature. At our core, things that are different intrigue us, yes, but also have the capability to scare us. It is not a fault, but rather, I believe, a crack in our human condition.
That is why we walk the line. We try our damnedest to steer clear of racism. All the while, however, we can not help but to be guilty of, what I like to call, raciality. Let me explain.
In our everyday lives we encounter people who are different from us. No matter if that difference is race, religion, sexuality, what have you, this is a big world. Today, though, we are focusing on race. I admit it: I am a white man. And, yes, I live in the South. But I was raised by parents who made sure my fears were based on the actions of others, not the colors of others. (For that, I am eternally grateful.) Even still, there are times when I fall victim to racial issues (locking the car door at an intersection or going to a gas station in a "better" area after dark, for example). Try as I might, I am not perfect. But when those fleeting moments occur, I feel guilty. Immediately.
And that, I believe, is the difference. When someone does something wrong (like my examples) because of race, they are the victim of raciality if they immediately realize their wrongs. But raciality has a tipping point that leads to out and out racism. When the feeling of guilt is removed, for example, that is racism. Committing a wrong on purpose without remorse is racism.
But wait, you say! What if someone kills another because of race and feels bad about it? That, of course, goes too far. Murder is murder, no matter the reason. But where do you draw the line of raciality and racism? That is a hard question; one even I struggle with. But I think common sense plays a part. We may disagree on what constitutes simple things, but we can agree as to what is clearly not a "simple" action of raciality.
Deny someone a loan or apartment because of race? That is racism.
Call someone an awful name? Racism.
Clutch your purse or bag but hate yourself for it? Raciality.
But why should there be a difference? Aren't all these action based on raced and, therefore, racist?
Yes. And no.
See, that fine line exists for a reason. There are times when something happens that has a racial component, but the action was not meant to be racist. The person in the wrong KNOWS he or she is in the wrong. He or she doesn't like being in the wrong. He or she would love to live free of that guilt by never having committed the wrong in the first place. So is that person truly a racist? Not likely. So why would society want to put that label on said person?
This is especially true knowing the reality of real racism is out here. There are people in every corner of every nation who are racist. They are white. They are black. They are this. They are that. There are people who have actual hate for other races. These, my friends, are the racists. These are the people that should be feared and scorned. They are the ones who should be labeled as the racists they are.
But it seems like we spend far more time arguing about Dale being a racist for sitting a few inches away from a coworker than we do about how to handle Amanda sending hate mail to a coworker.
And that is a problem. We as a people have come such a long way when it comes to race. We still have a long way to go, for sure. But there are a lot of folks who want to find racism. They find it in every action if they look close enough. Like my mother told me, "You'll always find the flaw if you look long enough."
And, when it comes to race, that seems to be the mentality of the day. When there are real racists committing real acts of racism, I am amazed at the level of energy being used to create acts of racism that were never there. Here's where it gets fun. Most of these acts, of course, have some race included (which is why these people "see" racism). But when one gets past the victim mentality and really examines the issue, most of the time it is an issue of raciality not racism. And that is the thing: Every action between two or more people of two or more races will ALWAYS have an aspect of raciality. There is NO way around it. And, if one looks hard enough, he or she will ALWAYS be a victim of racism if he or she wants to be.
But why on earth would anyone want to be a victim of something that never existed?
Good question. I have no idea. But I see it and read about it all the time. Actions that were never racist in the slightest are blown up to be so racially tinged that everyone wants to call racism. But playing that card is easy. It's holding back that card that is hard.
With actual racism bobbing around like the evil stench it is, I just wish we would all hold back on throwing the volatile race card on every fire --- especially those that were never really built.
Yesterday I had a long, sometimes arduous conversation with a great friend that quickly dived into the race pool. We've all been there. It is a place that is uncomfortable. It is a place that is wild. It is a place we'd really wish didn't exist. But it does.
For the most part we are an advanced people, capable of dealing with issues like race with relative care and, dare I say, a deft touch. Like it or not, we all walk a fine line of right and wrong. And there is nothing wrong with that --- it is just a fact of life. We'd all like to live in a perfect world where race isn't an issue. But that is not the case. And, sadly, it will never be the case. There are just far too many prejudices that are built in to us. Not, mind you, just by individual upbringing, but some of it is by nature. At our core, things that are different intrigue us, yes, but also have the capability to scare us. It is not a fault, but rather, I believe, a crack in our human condition.
That is why we walk the line. We try our damnedest to steer clear of racism. All the while, however, we can not help but to be guilty of, what I like to call, raciality. Let me explain.
In our everyday lives we encounter people who are different from us. No matter if that difference is race, religion, sexuality, what have you, this is a big world. Today, though, we are focusing on race. I admit it: I am a white man. And, yes, I live in the South. But I was raised by parents who made sure my fears were based on the actions of others, not the colors of others. (For that, I am eternally grateful.) Even still, there are times when I fall victim to racial issues (locking the car door at an intersection or going to a gas station in a "better" area after dark, for example). Try as I might, I am not perfect. But when those fleeting moments occur, I feel guilty. Immediately.
And that, I believe, is the difference. When someone does something wrong (like my examples) because of race, they are the victim of raciality if they immediately realize their wrongs. But raciality has a tipping point that leads to out and out racism. When the feeling of guilt is removed, for example, that is racism. Committing a wrong on purpose without remorse is racism.
But wait, you say! What if someone kills another because of race and feels bad about it? That, of course, goes too far. Murder is murder, no matter the reason. But where do you draw the line of raciality and racism? That is a hard question; one even I struggle with. But I think common sense plays a part. We may disagree on what constitutes simple things, but we can agree as to what is clearly not a "simple" action of raciality.
Deny someone a loan or apartment because of race? That is racism.
Call someone an awful name? Racism.
Clutch your purse or bag but hate yourself for it? Raciality.
But why should there be a difference? Aren't all these action based on raced and, therefore, racist?
Yes. And no.
See, that fine line exists for a reason. There are times when something happens that has a racial component, but the action was not meant to be racist. The person in the wrong KNOWS he or she is in the wrong. He or she doesn't like being in the wrong. He or she would love to live free of that guilt by never having committed the wrong in the first place. So is that person truly a racist? Not likely. So why would society want to put that label on said person?
This is especially true knowing the reality of real racism is out here. There are people in every corner of every nation who are racist. They are white. They are black. They are this. They are that. There are people who have actual hate for other races. These, my friends, are the racists. These are the people that should be feared and scorned. They are the ones who should be labeled as the racists they are.
But it seems like we spend far more time arguing about Dale being a racist for sitting a few inches away from a coworker than we do about how to handle Amanda sending hate mail to a coworker.
And that is a problem. We as a people have come such a long way when it comes to race. We still have a long way to go, for sure. But there are a lot of folks who want to find racism. They find it in every action if they look close enough. Like my mother told me, "You'll always find the flaw if you look long enough."
And, when it comes to race, that seems to be the mentality of the day. When there are real racists committing real acts of racism, I am amazed at the level of energy being used to create acts of racism that were never there. Here's where it gets fun. Most of these acts, of course, have some race included (which is why these people "see" racism). But when one gets past the victim mentality and really examines the issue, most of the time it is an issue of raciality not racism. And that is the thing: Every action between two or more people of two or more races will ALWAYS have an aspect of raciality. There is NO way around it. And, if one looks hard enough, he or she will ALWAYS be a victim of racism if he or she wants to be.
But why on earth would anyone want to be a victim of something that never existed?
Good question. I have no idea. But I see it and read about it all the time. Actions that were never racist in the slightest are blown up to be so racially tinged that everyone wants to call racism. But playing that card is easy. It's holding back that card that is hard.
With actual racism bobbing around like the evil stench it is, I just wish we would all hold back on throwing the volatile race card on every fire --- especially those that were never really built.
